Here is a recap of our weekend with our son!
Friday- we packed up the car and headed out to see our son! When we got there, there was a guy in the window that I didn't recognize! He has super short hair, no sagging pants, he stood straight! Then, with a second look, I saw those blue eyes! I had forgotten that they could shine! He greeted us with a "hey" and a hug. He showed us around the "campus", proudly. We got a glimpse of what his day to day life is like. The, we got to our cabin. After a few minutes, I broke down, not knowing if I could endure a weekend with him and his siblings. It appeared that he hadn't changed too much (his actions). We all went to bed eventually.
Saturday- a continuation of the night before. He didn't want to get up and get ready, he was emotional, and cranky. Again, I thought, "can I handle this"? I prayed that we would have a good day! Then, I locked my keys in the car! We called a locksmith and he got the car open for us. After that, things just seemed to fall into place. We finished getting ready and headed out to Eastland Mall in Bloomington, Illinois. We shopped as a family and generally had a good time. After lunch, we went to Wal-Mart to pick up a few things for his room (small table, lamp, and a rug). Later, back at the cabin, he taught us how to play some card games and we played for hours! He is a really good card player!
Sunday- we all slept in and when we woke up, it was raining and storming. After some breakfast, we played some games and got ready for the day. By the time we were all ready, it had stopped raining and was sunny. We drove our other kids to meet Grandpa, so they could go home. We had a counseling session set up for later that evening. After the drop-off, we took our son fishing! I think he really enjoyed doing that! We discussed what we might do for our "next" visit. We had some really nice conversations! We were pleasantly surprised with the talking he did!
Sunday evening- we had a counseling session. It started out with some "fluffy" conversation...then the work began! The tough questions were asked (and answered). I think there was a break through for our son and my husband. I won't get too personal, but they were struggling as Father/Son, and that has started to heal. We ALL have a long way to go in this journey, but if all our "visits" are like this, there is hope for total reconciliation.
How can you help? Pray. Pray. Pray! We love our son, but it is still VERY hard to have him away from our family. And, I am sure he is having a hard day settling back into his routine today.
Thursday, April 21, 2011
On Tuesday, April 19, my husband and I dropped our 14 year old son off at boarding school for boys. For the last year and a half, we have been dealing with him smoking marijuana, stealing from us, doing poorly in school, choosing friends that I don't approve of, extreme disrespect, and much more! We took him to counseling, got help for him for the drugs, got him extra help at school, and tried to discourage him from seeing certain kids. Nothing seemed to work. So, we started to explore our options for boarding schools. There are quite a few to choose from! We finally settled on one and got the paperwork done. On Tuesday, my feelings were all over the place! I wanted him to be safe and get the help he needs. Yet, on that day, I didn't want to leave him "all alone" at this school! Will the people there know what he likes to eat? How long it takes him to get ready in the morning? That he likes to start his day off with a glass of juice? I know that we made the right decison. A lot of thought and prayer went into this decision. We have wonderful friends that have prayed for us (and still are)! I clung to my husband that day as we left him and drove home. It has been 2 days and life around here is a little strange. We have gotten several emails and a phone call giving us reports on our son. They are telling us he is adjusting well and seems to fit in with the other boys there. I love getting these updates as we won't be able to see or talk to him for the next 6 weeks. It has been tough on our other 3 kids but they are adjusting too. They are writing notes and looking for little things to send him. I want to thank all of our friends and family for lifting us up in the their prayers. We will surely need those prayers in the days to come.